Our original film pitch read like this: With her parents on holiday, 19 year old uni student Ava Van Camp decides to live life to the full. But who will protect her when an uninvited guest turns up?
However, it did not relate to our sub genre of horror, namely Gothic horror. Thus, we changed it.
The church bell strikes 11. It is night. Elizabeth is sitting alone in a pew. A shadow looms over her. She had better hold her breath.
In this pitch, it was unclear who Elizabeth was so we altered it.
The church bell strikes 11. It is night. Nineteen year old Elizabeth sits alone in a pew. A shadow looms over her. She had better hold her breath.
We decided to change the name to something more Gothic, but we decided it didn't work. 19 year old Ava VanCamp is not alone. Praying for her dead mother in a local church, she senses an eerie presence looming in the shadows. And it strikes.
Our feedback was as follows:
At the end of the second pitch, 'And it strikes' seems to be telling too much of the story. Making it indirect could have a better affect and also by using a cliffhanger to intrigue the audience.
To finish, our evaluation questions were:
1.How have you identified your target audience in your pitch?
2.Why would this film appeal to your target audience?
3.How would this fit with your chosen sub genre?
4.How is this different to other horror films?
5.Why did you change it?
6.What feedback did you receive to make you change this?
1. Our target audience will be drawn in because we mention the age of our main character and our target audience is estimated to be around this age. It will also relate to our audience because we haven't identified the character's current status. This will attract more young adults, as they can range from uni-students to assistant shopkeepers to training medical practitioners.
2. This film will appeal to our audience, because at this stage in their life they may be interested in religion and find it familiar to them and so this relates to our gothic horror genre, because our main task is set in a church.
2.Why would this film appeal to your target audience?
3.How would this fit with your chosen sub genre?
4.How is this different to other horror films?
5.Why did you change it?
6.What feedback did you receive to make you change this?
1. Our target audience will be drawn in because we mention the age of our main character and our target audience is estimated to be around this age. It will also relate to our audience because we haven't identified the character's current status. This will attract more young adults, as they can range from uni-students to assistant shopkeepers to training medical practitioners.
2. This film will appeal to our audience, because at this stage in their life they may be interested in religion and find it familiar to them and so this relates to our gothic horror genre, because our main task is set in a church.
* U N F I N I S H E D*
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